From the monthly archives: "May 2014"


illuminatedtree-570x356 (Copy) You have heard me talk about it over and over—tune into your dharma, find your purpose, connect all your endeavors to your life’s mission. I preach it because I am certain of its universality—knowing and carrying out your life’s purpose will bring you the greatest fulfillment, while serving humanity and the universal dharma at the same time. If you thought my discourse has been purely spiritual mumbo-jumbo, well think again, because a recent study suggests that having a purpose in life actually increases longevity. That’s right—living to fulfill a mission gives more life. Makes sense, doesn’t it?

The study, published in Psychological Science, looked at data from over 6000 participants collected in the longitudinal Midlife in the United States (MIDUS) sample, and found that people who self-reported “purpose” to their lives lived longer than their counterparts during the 14 years after the baseline assessment, even when controlling for other markers of psychological and affective well-being.

Said lead study author Patrick Hill of Carleton University in Canada:

master-class-maya-angelou-2-600x411 (Copy)“Our findings point to the fact that finding a direction for life, and setting overarching goals for what you want to achieve can help you actually live longer, regardless of when you find your purpose,” says Hill. “So the earlier someone comes to a direction for life, the earlier these protective effects may be able to occur.”

Wow! Moreover, longevity benefits were not dependent on age, how long participants lived during the follow-up period, or whether they had retired from the workforce. Simply put: having a life’s purpose “appears to buffer against mortality risk across the adult years.”

But even so, researchers were surprised by the results: “These findings suggest that there’s something unique about finding a purpose that seems to be leading to greater longevity,” said Hill.

The longevity benefits of purpose in life held even after other indicators of psychological well-being, such as positive relations and positive emotions, were taken into account.

Mandela at 90Well I am not surprised; as I said, it makes sense. When living ‘on purpose,’ we have a reason to get up and go every morning, afternoon, and evening. This must have an effect on our physiology—rarely do body and mind act independently. Just think of stories we hear of people exhibiting super-human strength to save a loved one who’s in danger; or even the somewhat-known statistics showing that many people die shortly following retirement. Once the purpose goes, so often does the will to live.

Purpose gives meaning, and meaning drives us to carry on, so again, to me, these new results are not surprising in the slightest. I will keep pushing people to find their purpose in life—we all have one, on display or latent, I believe we all have a reason for existing in this lifetime. So find it and live it…and you might find that life gives you just the right time to accomplish your mission. If you need help tapping into your purpose—contact me; I have fool-proof methods for uncovering your dharma. And if you are fully attuned to your life’s purpose now—great, keep moving in the direction of its accomplishment, and you will find your fulfillment complete as well.

Love is NOT:

Always being happy

Never fighting

Agreeing on everything

Having all the same interests

Expecting one to live up to unrealistic idealisms

Always having the same vision

Not hurting one another

Never crying

Having the same friends

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Love is:

Accepting and honoring the whole person

Freedom to grow

Wanting the best for everyone

Even if it goes against what you want

Supporting the path of another

Even when that path differs from your own

Working to help others get what they love

While getting what you love

And knowing when to walk away instead of standing in the way…

That’s love

Part 2 of a multipart series (part 1 here)

So what if the flow stops flowing? Can you say it has ever been flowing? Ask yourself the tough question, because if the answer is no, then it is quite possible that you aren’t living according to your values. Huh? Yeah…it really isn’t that uncommon, people living according to someone else’s values, or even to what they think their values should be.

MVrlpMO (Copy)Take money for example: I have yet to met a Westerner who has said he or she doesn’t want it; that he or she, in fact, renounces wealth. Uh uh… In fact, if you were to ask a roomful of Americans, Canadians, Brits, Australians or other European or South American people whether or not they would love to be wealthy, I am certain that 99.9999999% of them would say, “Yes definitely!”

But how many people actually do what it takes to be wealthy? Sure, sure, we all think of the mega-superstar, multi-platinum performing artist—the Jay-Zs, the Calvin Harris’s, the Kardashians (or insert any superstar in your industry)—and think that is the way to riches, and that it just might happen for us too. Yeah right. Sorry but those people are not even the 1% (.05% by one calculation).

No to become wealthy requires saving, accumulating and earning interest (or capital gains or profit). And only when people value money do they actually do this. Most people, in my observation, value what they can buy with money. In other words, it’s something other than the money they truly value, even though money is the means by which they acquire it.

MillionaireI know a man who epitomizes true wealth valuing. This man rarely spends money. He wears old tattered tee-shirts. He always looks for bargains. If he has to pay a fine or a ticket of some sort, he nearly has a heart attack. And this man is rich—filthy, stinkin’ rich—he can afford it, but that’s besides the point to him. He drives the cheapest car he can find; he doesn’t care. If you explained ‘bling’ to him, he’d laugh, guaranteed. Bling is for people who don’t really value money—they value bling. And they often don’t keep their money for very long either. That is reality.

Nonetheless, ask most Westerners if they would love to be wealthy, and most will say yes. But why, then, are so few people monetarily rich? Simply put: because in reality, most people only think they value wealth—or even more accurately, they think they are supposed to value wealth. We are so inundated with the concept of bling in the Western world, and the illusions of wealth put forth by the popular media, that people create a fantasy that they, too, want bling.

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Think of all the stuff one could buy, or do, or the power, or the girls, or the guys, or whatever… And when one’s current reality doesn’t live up to one’s created fantasy, then the inevitable happens: one beats oneself up…and says their flow is not flowing.

donald-trump (Copy)Yes this is the quintessential example of living by someone else’s values. Observing the illusions of the outer world and desiring them without doing what it takes to truly achieve them. Sorry but here’s a wake up call: If you want Donald Trump money, then you gotta act, think and breathe like The Donald. But if you aren’t thinking, living, or breathing money 24/7; if you aren’t saving more than you are spending, and if you aren’t sacrificing your consumerist urges to watch your bank account grow, then well…keep dreaming.

Stressed_Mom_and_Baby_Web (Copy)But not just money that people mistakenly think they value: also success, relationships, children, a particular career can all be false drives when a person thinks those things are virtuous and should be valued. However, if I have said it once, I have said it a thousand times: No values are more virtuous than any others! You love art, fashion, music, sports, physical intimacy, animals, math, scuba diving—then indulge in them. You are not required to value money, a particular profession, children, or anything else. In fact trying to do so, outside of your true values, is the quickest way to frustration, and ultimately to depression.

So when you think that the flow has stopped flowing, just ask yourself: what is my criteria? Is it financial gain, recognition, helping people, or creating something? And is your criteria aligned with your values? Because if you are only using finances as your criteria, and you don’t actually value money, but instead value what it affords you, then you will have a hard time seeing any flow other than outflow: from your bank account to your vendors.

dsc_1734 (Copy)A better approach, then, would be to be honest about what you really value—let’s say, helping people—and if you are doing it, then your flow is flowing, simple as that. However, we all know how important money is to survival, and because of this people think they must value it. Just remember that earning money and accumulating money are two very different things (ask Mike Tyson). So you can connect your earning potential to your true values very simply, but that is an entirely different subject—one I can help you with if you contact me (drnick@drnickcampos.com).

Next time I will discuss the very real scenario of decreased money flow despite money being a true value.

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