Currently viewing the category: "gastroenteritis"

Have you ever had “stomach flu?”  Gastroenteritis–man it’s the $#!*$.  I got it again this weekend, and I must say…makes you feel like dying.  President Zachary Taylor died of gastroenteritis in 1850.  You’re probably thinking, “No S#*T!,” but believe me he gave more than he had…I speak from experience.

Now this post isn’t about my horrid weekend.  It’s about what I call perspective balancing.  Sometimes we take life for granted–we get all high on ourselves, thinking this or that was built for us specifically (whatever our own personal this or that’s happens to be at any given time).  Let’s just say we might even believe that our $#!T doesn’t smell.  And that’s when life teaches us otherwise.

No, no, no…I don’t believe we get gastroenteritis to teach us any metaphysical lessons.  But what I know for sure is that when you are curled up on the couch…alone…writhing in severe pain…wanting to puke at every Jack in the Box commercial that comes on the tube, but you have no strength to even reach over to the remote and turn that crap off (no pun intended…well, okay, maybe just a little)…there is a strange little mind thing that occurs…you realize you ain’t all that, and it could be Zachary-Taylor-time any day, any hour, any minute.  And it makes you realize…all the crap you worry about, all the crap you think you are doing or NOT doing…really doesn’t matter because…well, anything beats gastroenteritis…even a root canal.

Perspective balancing is what happens as you writhe in pain from gastroenteritis, and even more so when you stop.  The sky looks brighter, the birds sound more cheerful, everyone is your brother–better than LSD, I tell ya–you gotta try it sometime.  But heed my warning: it’s definitely not for the faint at gut.

*Thank you’s to Jen R. for inspiring this piece with her question, and to foodborne illness for making me see the light (hallelujah, free again!)

Well, 2008 has started with a bang! Just not the one I’d been hoping for. As I was shaking off the blow of a serious tooth infection, and a subsequent root canal, I got nailed with the stomach flu–gastroenteritis to be exact–and I’m only just starting to feel my old raucous self today.

Gastroenteritis is often called the stomach flu, although it’s nothing like the regular flu–no fever, no body aches or pains, none of that stuff. What is was, however, was a lot of stomach ache–cramping, crippling spasms that had me boweled over in pain for about 48 hours. Many things can cause gastroenteritis–bacteria, viruses, toxins, medications, some other things. I think mine was probably viral, but it could have also been from taking Motrin; I was taking 2,400 mg a day for the toothache I was enjoying.

Either way, I stopped taking the meds on Friday, immediately following my first hit of flu. I also stopped drinking coffee and pretty much eating all together. If, in spite of my haze, I am remembering all the details correctly, I think I couldn’t even stomach water; I was helpless. But did it ever make me find religion. Please Oh Mighty Isis. Make it stop, please. Nicky be good boy. Nicky be good boy…

Once again I have to say, being sick is a part of life. You can get depressed about it (it’s easy, really), or you can just see it as a time to take care of yourself–rest, relax, catch up on paperwork, and even on those missed episodes of Real Housewives of Orange County (right PB?). There’s no such thing as 100% health, 100% of the time; and living in that illusion is the quickest way to frustration and/or depression. We all get sick. Bless it, use it to your advantage, and rest up. There’s plenty of life to be lived tomorrow.

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